I was just wondering today while having my evening coffee, I haven`t been doing so much so late. Life has been more self oriented, focus has been only on me unlike before. I sat down and looked out of my window to see a silent street- My street is always supposed to be busy and noisy with children playing around, men standing on their bikes discussing sports, women gossiping and people on walk. Today, may be because its a Sunday the streets were empty, a grave silence filled the whole area.I saw only this 'flower vendor' sitting there alone and idle. (Daily on my way back from evening walk, I cross this lady who sells flowers- Her jasmine is always special with its strong pleasant smell and freshness. I acknowledge her with a smile noting my attendance everyday) I thought of going over to her and having a small chat.
So I made a cup of coffee for her and went down, she was so happy and excited when I told her I came down just to talk to her, she gave me a big reception and a stool to sit. I stretched my hand to lend her the cup, I could see her happiness in the eyes. She smiled at me and said its the first time someone had made coffee for her. I asked her who all were there at home, She sipped her coffee and spoke in a soft tone.
"I live by myself, no family. I ran away from home when I was 8 due to my aunt`s torture."
I went to her just to give her a company for a while since it was a lonely day for her I suppose.
I wasn't expecting her to open up suddenly to me, neither did I expect a tragic story. I thought she might tell me about her kids and may be maximum a drunkard husband. she maintained the silence, I had to break it- I asked her "Are you not married?"
she looked into my eyes and I could read a different expression which made me want to take back the question I had asked her. She replied "who will want to marry a woman with nothing except flowers that bloom everyday just to help her satisfy her hunger!?"
Before I could ask her anything,
She continued, "I was a fool who fell for men`s trap many a times until I realized they are flesh eating animals who just need a woman to satisfy his lust"
"I was at Madurai till I was 35 yrs and moved to Chennai to escape from the tag they were pushing me into -a whore"
I felt so bad for her. "I have my principles in life that I don't want to give up under any circumstance. I cant live without dignity even in poverty"
I took her hands in mine and pressed them as a gesture of support. I felt so proud of her that she was a woman of dignity.
I wanted to change the topic when she suddenly started again, "I found this means of earning myself to fight poverty, I pluck flowers from house gardens and was shooed away many a times but later sold it to get money for tea, now that I sell garlands and at least get enough for my meals thrice a day"
I asked her "Over these years nobody gave you a job even as a domestic help?" I asked so since she has been here for the past so many years,same street ,same job. So its obvious that people around knows her well.
She said "Darling, I am a known transgender in this locality. Nobody would like me helping at their household but they need me every time to bless for anything auspicious at their house."
I never knew she was a transgender, she has always been a bold and beautiful lady.
So I asked her why isn't she moving to a place near temples or on main roads where she can have more business. But since she has to pay rent for that again or get a place near temples on yearly auction, It was tough for her. She didn't go to the roads because she said she has to be loyal to those people who come in search of her. I was amazed at her sincerity.
She said, "After all I have no liabilities. I need to make enough everyday only to feed myself."
I was wondering in my mind People don't respect or consider transgenders even on humanitarian grounds when they are in need but shamelessly come to them for blessing when they buy a new car or when a baby is born.
This lady who prefers to call herself 'Roja' whirled my thoughts today to think about why do we feel attached to worldly pleasures. Life is after all about how you live. She made me realize how lucky I am in many ways. Even in her poverty she was adamant to keep up her dignity.
So I made a cup of coffee for her and went down, she was so happy and excited when I told her I came down just to talk to her, she gave me a big reception and a stool to sit. I stretched my hand to lend her the cup, I could see her happiness in the eyes. She smiled at me and said its the first time someone had made coffee for her. I asked her who all were there at home, She sipped her coffee and spoke in a soft tone.
"I live by myself, no family. I ran away from home when I was 8 due to my aunt`s torture."
I went to her just to give her a company for a while since it was a lonely day for her I suppose.
I wasn't expecting her to open up suddenly to me, neither did I expect a tragic story. I thought she might tell me about her kids and may be maximum a drunkard husband. she maintained the silence, I had to break it- I asked her "Are you not married?"
she looked into my eyes and I could read a different expression which made me want to take back the question I had asked her. She replied "who will want to marry a woman with nothing except flowers that bloom everyday just to help her satisfy her hunger!?"
Before I could ask her anything,
She continued, "I was a fool who fell for men`s trap many a times until I realized they are flesh eating animals who just need a woman to satisfy his lust"
"I was at Madurai till I was 35 yrs and moved to Chennai to escape from the tag they were pushing me into -a whore"
I felt so bad for her. "I have my principles in life that I don't want to give up under any circumstance. I cant live without dignity even in poverty"
I took her hands in mine and pressed them as a gesture of support. I felt so proud of her that she was a woman of dignity.
I wanted to change the topic when she suddenly started again, "I found this means of earning myself to fight poverty, I pluck flowers from house gardens and was shooed away many a times but later sold it to get money for tea, now that I sell garlands and at least get enough for my meals thrice a day"
I asked her "Over these years nobody gave you a job even as a domestic help?" I asked so since she has been here for the past so many years,same street ,same job. So its obvious that people around knows her well.
She said "Darling, I am a known transgender in this locality. Nobody would like me helping at their household but they need me every time to bless for anything auspicious at their house."
I never knew she was a transgender, she has always been a bold and beautiful lady.
So I asked her why isn't she moving to a place near temples or on main roads where she can have more business. But since she has to pay rent for that again or get a place near temples on yearly auction, It was tough for her. She didn't go to the roads because she said she has to be loyal to those people who come in search of her. I was amazed at her sincerity.
She said, "After all I have no liabilities. I need to make enough everyday only to feed myself."
I was wondering in my mind People don't respect or consider transgenders even on humanitarian grounds when they are in need but shamelessly come to them for blessing when they buy a new car or when a baby is born.
This lady who prefers to call herself 'Roja' whirled my thoughts today to think about why do we feel attached to worldly pleasures. Life is after all about how you live. She made me realize how lucky I am in many ways. Even in her poverty she was adamant to keep up her dignity.
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